Angela's Online Discussion Group

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Angela's Online Discussion Group
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PCS 1999 - 2000 My Story

I'll start off by saying I am a firm believer in what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. I am living proof after going through PCS. Before I tell you about that I will let you know how I am now.

I am 25, married, an EMT, volunteer firefighter, SKYWARN weather spotter, also do some security work. I am just fine.

A little bit of back story building to PCS. I am one of the guinie pig generation kids. When I was in 5th or 6th grade they said oh he has ADD and stuck me on ritalin. Wouldn't you know it I don't have ADD. That's a shock ain't it? Then it was ODD which is Oppositional Defiance Disorder. That may be possible as that is basically total disregard and disrespect for authority. Guess I grew out of it. Then the next thing was bi polar disorder. Wrong again.

No psychologist worth their license will diagnose anyone under the age of 25 with bi polar disorder because the brain is not fully developed until about that age. You want to know what my problem was? I was a teenager. Yes I will admit I do have a bit of anger problem but I keep it under control. This is evidenced by the fact that I am licensed to carry a firearm and do carry a fire arm and I haven't shot anyone.

As I have gotten older and did a little research here and there I figured out my own little diagnosis of just being a normal teenager. I had normal teenage depression as it is called now. When I was on Zoloft for that it was the lowest dose possible. My parents had a bad relationship so I wound up acting out and getting in trouble to get attention. I acknowledge the anger issue as something that was actually substantial.

Everybody knows a teenager is nothing but a walking container of hormones. Everything is haywire as the body develops and grows. Mood swings are an obvious side effect and so is acting out by say rebellious acts. It is to what extent and how the parents deal with it that is the problem. Now let me get into PCS stories.

I was there for about a year and half total. I did actually improve my anger control a good bit there but that's about it. The system they have is rigged to where you basically can't win. I seemed to end up in short term quite a bit which is their version of detention. Well I spent a lot of time in investment.

I got to the point that I said I can't win and I quit caring. I used to fight with the staff for fun for something to do. Then the nurse would come in and shoot you in the ass with Haldol. Vitamin H is what we called it. The first time I was still fighting when the nurse shot me up with it and it hurt like hell. Once I found that out every time after when the nurse got there I fully relaxed until the shot went in and the needle came out and then I started fighting again until I finally passed out.

One dial 9 on me I had to get stitches from. The one guard tripped as they were trying to take me to the floor and I busted my chin open and I had to get 5 or 6 stitches. It may have been a couple hours before I got taken to get looked at to. A lot of times I got dial 9'd I would have carpet burns from it.

Whatever trust fund money was coming from that paid for me to be there dried up and the state of Texas wound up funding me through the school district. Wasn't more than a few months after that the school district decided I wasn't sick enough to be there and they weren't paying anymore and I came home.

They had a guard there named John Nichols and he was a rough one. I remember CPS interviewed me about the guy and I guess he wound up getting fired. Small victory I guess.

Of course there was writing grievances and nothing ever happened about them. My counselor may have said something about them but nothing was ever done. The whole thing is a chicken **** operation. When I was there I heard the place is actually one level below being classified as a juvenile detention facility.

To end this thread on a positive note and bring back my current status I want to tell y'all this. I moved from Texas to Pennsylvania and saw a psychologist here because I was still on pills. He saw e a few times and he said why are you on these pills. He came to the conclusion I did not have bi polar and weened me off. He said I do have an anger issue and just to control it. I have been off any pills for 5 years now. I haven't had any problems what so ever.

I know there are kids with problems and the ones on drugs and things like that should get rehab. The problem is people need to realize there is normal teenage behavior and then there is really bad acting out like what I did. What people don't do is really find out what the cause is. I take responsibility for my actions and my behavior and I can't blame anyone for my actions but when I look back I realize I was trying to get attention anyway I could from my parents. There was the cause right there. My parents had a bad relationship and I wanted some attention and I didn't care whether it was good or bad. I then acted out but that was a choi

Re: PCS 1999 - 2000 My Story

Editing didn't take and then it said I posted too uch or something.

Anyhow what I was saying is my acting out was a choice and I don't blame my parents for my actions.

Sorry to rattle on I didn't realize I had so much to say.